Decorating My Apartment After Heartbreak: How Interior Styling Can Help You Heal & Thrive
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I've said it before, and I will say it again: decorating is about so much more than just simply making things look pretty. There's power in the pretty. With every decorating decision you make in your space, there's meaning behind it.
And one of the meaningful things I've been rediscovering is how the act of decorating my new apartment has had a profound impact on my ability to heal after heartbreak and start to rediscover my self-confidence.
If you've watched my recent new apartment decorating video series where I took you through the whole journey of moving into my new apartment and decorating it, then you know that I went through a tough time for a couple years. Which is what ultimately led me to leave the relationship I was in and move into this new apartment on my own.
And right now, my confidence is on the mend. I'm still very much going through something of a post-traumatic identity crisis, the effects of which I am still feeling to this day… but there has been one thing that has been instrumental in the progress I've made. And that is decorating this place.
So in this post, I thought I would talk about how the act of decorating this apartment has helped me in my healing process and helped me start to get back to myself.
Unfortunately, we're all healing from something on some level, and decorating is one of the many tools we can use to help heal our weary souls, and simply inject more joy in our daily lives. So let's talk about how exactly!
Would you rather watch than read? Here’s the video! ↓
1. Decorating Your Apartment Can Be Identity Affirming
One way decorating my apartment has helped in my healing process is it's allowed me tap back into my sense of identity, my sense of self. I really lost sight of myself for a while there. And the act of decorating this space with my personality, with my taste, with my creative expression, and have it all be up to me and not be influenced by anyone else… it's been very identity affirming.
So when you're decorating your apartment, keep in mind that you’re not just making things look good. You’re actually actively expressing your identity and who you are as a person. And that's a big confidence booster.
This is why it's important to really consider your personality, your interests, your hobbies, the things that make you you, and incorporate those things in your styling. Because ultimately that is what's going to make your space feel like yours.
So I've been really enjoying getting back in touch with my identity through the act of styling my space. It really helps me feel like me again.
2. Apartment Styling = Communication
Another way in which decorating my apartment has been very helpful for my healing and my confidence-building is the fact that decorating is such a strong form of communication.
When I decorate, I feel like I am talking through my decor. And for someone who is as introverted as I am, I love any way that I can communicate who I am without using words.
When I'm decorating, my goal is for you to be able to know certain things about me without me saying a word about myself. And I personally find it so empowering to be able to communicate through my styling choices.
It’s the same thing with fashion. When I put an outfit together every day, I am communicating something. This way, no matter how little I say, my style choices speak volumes for me.
And having this means of communication is a very healing experience for me. It's like I'm getting a voice back that I didn't have for a couple years.
3. Apartment Decorating is a Creative Outlet
Another way that decorating my new apartment has been incredibly healing is it's a wonderful a creative outlet. And any creative outlet that gives you a profound sense of gratification is going to be healing.
Humans are innately creative. Even if you don't consider yourself a creative person, you're a human being. Creativity is like breathing; it’s innately part of you!
But I was going through a time for those couple years where I wasn't feeling a shred of creativity. It was like all inspiration was dried up in me. And to go from the inspiration explosion that I had felt when I decorated my studio apartment a few years ago to feeling creatively empty in the last apartment I was living in… that was a huge blow to my mental health.
And I'm honestly still struggling with creativity. But what's been wonderful about decorating this place is it's a very tangible way to reconnect with the creativity that I had lost touch with in such a painful way.
Instead of thinking of decorating as a purely materialistic act, think of it as an important type of creative expression. It’s like a really fun art project that you get to live in when you're done!
4. Decorating Your Apartment Can Give You a Sense of Belonging
Another way in which decorating this new apartment has been really helpful for me is it's given me a sense of belonging. I never felt like I really belonged in my last apartment. It never felt like home.
One of the things I love about decorating is it gives me a sense of belonging, a sense of staking my claim. I am making this apartment my own, even though I'm technically renting it.
Having a sense of ownership over your space is very empowering. And with every apartment I've ever lived in over the years, decorating almost felt like a brazen act of defiance. You know, I'm just a millennial girl who will probably never own a house and I will probably be living in apartments for the rest of my life, but that does not mean that I cannot use decor to create that sense of ownership over my space!
So feeling that sense of ownership, that sense of belonging, has been very healing for me.
5. Apartment Styling is Romantic
Another way that styling this new apartment has been very helpful in my healing process is the fact that decorating creates a sense of romance in your everyday life. I may not be in a relationship anymore, but my life is not lacking in the romance department because my space is romantic. 🙃
The thing about creating a beautifully styled space, whatever that means for you, is it takes the mundane moments of each day and heightens them. Styling imbues those average moments with a sense of importance and romance.
I want be able to look around my space in even the most mundane moments and feel that spontaneous sparkle in my soul, just from looking at the pretty styling I created. Those little sparkly moments are what elevate your daily life in your apartment, and provide some much needed dopamine hits as you move through your day.
I personally want to inject as much magic in my day-to-day life as possible. And, for me at least, decorating my apartment makes my days feel more magical in here. So creating that sense of magic and romance through my styling decisions has been very healing.
6. Styling Your Apartment is Like Writing a Love Letter to Yourself
I mean, think about it. You decide to put the effort in and to spend the money on the decor, and you experience the trials and tribulations of the whole decorating process. It can be a lot! And going through all of that is the ultimate act of telling yourself, “I am worth it. I am worth all this effort.”
Decorating is the ultimate act of self love. By decorating your space and making it your own, you are carving out your own little sliver of the world that is yours, and that's an act of love for yourself.
So I think for me, the fact that I've basically written this love letter to myself has been a very healing experience. I'm still dealing with a lot of insecurity and self-doubt and… self-loathing, to be frank. And I'm admitting this to you because I don't want you to think that healing is like a magic switch that you flip.
But I think it's important put your self love into action as you heal. And decorating is action. It's something you do, it's something you make happen, and then it's something that you get to enjoy every day once you've done it. It’s the ultimate love letter to yourself.
So those are some of the main ways in which decorating my new apartment have helped me in my post-heartbreak healing process. Let me know in the comments below, have you experienced the healing effects of decorating? And if so, how? How has decorating helped you in the hard times?
