New Apartment Decorating: The Struggles of Styling a New Space + How to Overcome Them!
New apartment decorating definitely comes with plenty of struggles; from figuring out your small apartment layout, to achieving your dream apartment aesthetic, to finding small apartment decorating ideas… it’s a lot. 😅 And I am not immune to these struggles when approaching our new 1 bedroom apartment design!
So in this video, I’m giving you an apartment tour to show you where we’re at in the interior styling process. Then I’m sharing what my challenges have been with this new apartment and how I’m overcoming them, so that you can apply what I’ve learned to your own small apartment styling!
Remember, every stylish space has to look shitty before it can be pretty. You got this!
Video Transcript ↓
If you've watched my YouTube channel for any length of time, you have probably heard me say that every stylish space has to look shitty before it can be pretty.
And right now, our new apartment is in its relatively shitty phase. 🙃
Of course, it's not shitty by any stretch of the imagination - this is a really nice apartment. But it's not at the place yet where it feels like home, like our own personal sanctuary.
It's like I've been too mentally congested with all this other stuff in my head, which I will talk about later in the video. Something has just sort of blocked me from my creative decorating brain.
So I'm going share what my struggles have been over the last couple months with decorating this space and share what I've learned from it all, so that you can apply these learnings to decorating your own apartment!
If you're new to my channel, my name is Steffi and I'm the creator of the interior style blog, Moda Misfit, as well as the online course, Small Apartment Styling School. And you're watching Living Pretty, the place for apartment styling tips and inspiration!
And if you're also in a situation like me, where you've just moved into a new apartment and you are struggling with how to decorate it, then I highly recommend you check out my free workshop, Decorate Your Dream Apartment Without Spending Money on the Wrong Decor for You, which you can watch on demand, anytime!
In this FREE, 1-hour workshop, I’ll teach you how to…
Discover your personal style so you can decorate a space that feels like YOU
Create mood boards to help you visualize what your apartment could look like before buying things
Shop for decor in a way that will save you money and allow you to buy things that actually fit your space and your personality
If all that sounds like exactly what you need to create the dreamy apartment you’ve been yearning for, click here to watch the workshop!
New Apartment Decorating Struggle #1:
Who am I without my studio apartment?
So the first struggle I'm going to talk about is the fact that moving out of my studio apartment caused a minor identity crisis for me.
I didn't realize how much of my identity was wrapped up in the studio apartment. I lived there for five years, I grew so much as a person in there, I started Moda Misfit and my YouTube channel, because of the studio.
So when you take the studio out of my life equation, I feel very untethered. And not having it sort of launched me into an existential crisis in which I had to confront, “who am I without the studio?”
Now, I know that sounds like a lot to place on just an apartment, but that's just how I operate!
So if you're anything like me and you have left a space in which a huge part of your identity is wrapped up, here's my take on how we overcome this, or just cope with it.
I think it's a matter of somehow striking the balance between holding a special place in your heart for that previous apartment or previous life situation and creating room for the new space or new life situation.
Because at the end of the day, we have to move forward. I wasn't going to live in that studio apartment for the rest of my life. I'm ready for my life to move forward to the next chapter where I'm sharing my life with Kobee, my boyfriend.
When I shift my focus to what I'm actually gaining in this new situation, it's very easy to see that this was the right move and it's time to create another identity within these walls.
New Apartment Decorating Struggle #2:
Change = Depression + Anxiety
Another one of my struggles with moving into this new apartment is the fact that I am very bad with change. I've always dealt with depression and anxiety, and change (even if it's good change) really triggers both.
So for the last two or three months, I have been stuck in this mental space of feeling those depression demons coming back.
Depression makes very simple things feel like insurmountable tasks, and decorating for me has been one of those insurmountable tasks - even though it's something I love doing and I'm passionate about it.
So if you have dealt with depression and anxiety getting in the way of even the things that you love doing, here's how I've been kind of working to overcome that.
I've honestly just given myself the space to not decorate. There's been some decorating, but aside from that, I haven't really pushed myself. Sometimes decorating isn't the priority.
I've said this in videos before, and I say it in my online course, Small Apartment Styling School, that decorating is not a requirement. It is a pleasurable luxury.
If you're not in the financial, emotional, or energetic space to decorate, then don't decorate!
And when you are ready to decorate - which I feel like I'm getting to the place where I am ready - I think it's a matter of taking small actions, and then those small actions build up, and eventually your space starts to look pretty good!
New Apartment Decorating Struggle #3:
Sharing space with another human
The next struggle I've been dealing with while moving into this new apartment is one that I expected would be a challenge for me, but I don't think I expected it to be this much of a challenge… And that is the fact that I am sharing a space with my boyfriend, Kobee.
And that means compromising and collaborating and truly sharing the space with another human being!
And one of my toxic traits is the fact that… I frankly don't like compromising and collaborating. We’re working on that!
This is the first time Kobee and I are in a space that is truly both of ours, that we are making decisions together on. And I've been finding that I've really been struggling with having to share the decision making process with someone else.
One of the things that I preach about on my YouTube channel is to really have yourself - you as a person - in mind when you're decorating your apartment. To make styling decisions based on your personality and the things that you love in life.
I have a very self-centered approach to decorating, in the sense that I urge you to put your SELF at the CENTER of all your decorating decisions.
What I'm realizing is that, even though I stand by that belief, when you factor someone else into that, it becomes a little harder.
There's a huge part of me that has been like, “Well, if I can't make all these decisions myself and do everything I wanna do without considering someone else, then I don't really wanna do it.” And that's not good! I fully realize that is not a good, healthy way to be.
So if you too have just moved in with your significant other, or you've been living with your significant other for a while, and you're having some of these issues that I'm having, here's how I've been trying to overcome it.
The key is communication. And I know that sounds so cliche, but it's true. I have tried my best to communicate with Kobee and share these darker parts of myself; the parts that are self-centered and can't compromise or collaborate about my space.
I've just been open about them because if they come out in ugly ways and cause tension between us, at least Kobee has some point of reference about where it’s coming from. Doesn't excuse my, uh, more selfish behavior… but at least we're open with each other and we know what needs to be worked on!
And I’m also trying to allow for the fact that amazing decorating decisions can be made with two people, putting their heads together, rather than me taking ownership over everything.
That's a hard pill for me to swallow, but logically, I know that it's true: beautiful things can happen from collaboration.
So if you're going through something similar, keep that in mind, beautiful things can happen from collaboration!
New Apartment Decorating Struggle #4:
The empty canvas curse
Another struggle I've been dealing with is the empty canvas curse, which is when you have a brand new empty apartment and it has all this promise and potential, but at the end of the day, it's an empty canvas and suddenly you have to put a pretty picture together on it.
I'm not usually intimidated by an empty apartment. I'm pretty good at figuring out what I wanna do. But you add all these other struggles that I've been talking about into the equation, and suddenly the empty canvas feels… really empty.
So with this empty canvas curse, I am having a hard time getting inspired and establishing a vision for this space.
If you've watched my workshop or any of my videos, you know that I believe establishing a strong vision for your space in the beginning of the decorating process is KEY.
You want to feel that sense of inspiration and overall vision so that it propels you through your decorating process and gets you to make good decisions.
I've been having a hard time finding that vision with this new apartment!
So to overcome this, my advice to you and to myself, is to go back to the basics. Peruse Instagram and Pinterest, try to find some visual inspiration that will spark that creativity in you.
And really, just watch any of my YouTube videos. They are all about finding your style, establishing your vision, figuring out how to decorate your space so that it aligns with you.
And again, my free workshop, Decorate Your Dream Apartment Without Spending Money on the Wrong Decor for You is a really good place to start for establishing this sense of vision and figuring out how to proceed with your decorating!
New Apartment Decorating Struggle #5:
I’ve been busy starting a web design business!
And the final struggle I'm gonna talk about is actually a really good thing!
It's a good thing that has distracted me away from decorating the apartment and from my YouTube channel, and it’s a brand new creative endeavor that I'm starting…
Over the last three months, I have been building a brand new business as a web designer! And that has taken a lot of my time and energy. I've already designed three websites over the last three months, and I'm on my fourth right now.
So in addition to Moda Misfit, I am also now a web designer, which was inspired in the first place by Moda Misfit. When I started Moda Misfit back in 2018 and created my website for it and my blog for it, I fell in love with web design.
Because apparently it's not enough for me to decorate physical spaces. I also need to decorate digital spaces as well.
So I'm gonna give myself a little shameless plug for my new web design business, Steffi Designs. If you need a website or know of anyone who needs a website, take a look at my work and reach out if you want me to do your website!
So if you're in a similar situation where you're launching yourself into a brand new creative endeavor, or maybe you've started a new position at work or just got a new job, and the time and energy and focus that that new thing takes is taking away from decorating, my advice is to focus on that thing.
Like I said earlier, decorating is not a requirement. Sometimes other things have to take priority. And if you have a dream, in order to realize that dream, you really have to throw yourself into it.
And it just so happens that I started Steffi Designs right when we were moving into this new apartment, and it's been yet another sort of energy suck that has taken away from decorating the space. And frankly, I think that's okay!
Maybe just find little ways, little actions you can take to make your space feel inspiring, at least to some extent. But aside from those little actions of decorating your space, I think it's totally fine to fully focus on the dream you're pursuing!
So those are the things that I have been struggling with, or just have gotten in the way of decorating our new apartment!
And stick with me because I'm gonna keep giving you my apartment styling tips. And what's even better is they will be based on my actual experience in decorating this apartment with Kobee. And you'll be able to see this whole apartment come together!
For daily glimpses into my apartment life, you can follow me on Instagram @moda.misfit.
And for regular doses of apartment styling tips and small space decor inspiration, subscribe to my YouTube channel and hit the bell to be notified when a new video goes up every week.